I AM OPTIMUS PRIME.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

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this is what matthew said to me yesterday,
"its always darkest before dawn, look out for the silver lining."

then of course, matthew being well, matthew,
he said, i'm coming back, i'm the silver lining.hah.
matthew as always, makes me laugh.

i wonder how raisah is now.
i miss you! sighh.
i really wanna talk to raisah now.

just as i was about to stand up again,
i lose my grandma, someone i love very much.
i miss my grandma.
when school reopens, it'll be the first time, my gran isn't there to send me off to school.
even when she's sick, she'll wake up in the morning, sit on the sofa, make sure i've woken up and watch me prepare to go to school, until i leave.
i still remember when i was little, i didn't want to drink the milo prepared by anyone else. it must be my grandma who prepares the milo, or i won't drink it.
now when i come home from school, she wouldn't be there on the sofa.
she wouldn't be there asking me how was school like she does everyday.
she wouldn't be there to tell me to get more rest.
she wouldn't be there to listen to me whine when my bro teases me.
she wouldn't be there telling me stories of my grandfather or the olden times in kampung.
she wouldn't be there. just wouldn't be there.
i've no one to call wawa anymore.

i have to get used to not having my grandma around.
at night, when everyone has gone to sleep,
i feel lonely.
i feel the loss.
she has done so much for my family and I.
like raisah said before she left singapore,
she's in a better place now.
thank you wawa.
everytime i say thank you, she says "wawa ni orang ape?"
terima kasih wawa...

SMILING and WISHING at... |1:53 PM|

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